American Lifestyle!

Many of the social and behavioral aspects of everyday life vary greatly from country to country. Some students might find it initially difficult to understand the way Americans behave and what they really mean to say you will have to remember certain important points to handle social interactions in the US comfortably.

Greetings:
Upon meeting people for the first time Americans shake hands with a phrase such as, “Pleased to meet you”. In a more casual setting with peers, people often just say ‘Hi’. It is usually acceptable to use the first name of someone of the same age group. Older people may be addressed with ‘Mr. /Ms/Mrs. /Dr/Prof’, etc., along with the surname. Most women prefer to be addressed as ‘Ms’ (pronounced: ‘mizz’), irrespective of whether they are married or not. The use of nicknames is fairly common.

Personal Space
When two people are talking to each other, they tend to stand a specific distance apart. Each person has an invisible boundary around their body into which other people may not come. Try to avoid physical contact while you are speaking, since this may also lead to discomfort.

Friendship/Acquaintance:
You need not hesitate to ask somebody for instructions on how to use the vending machines. People enjoy doing things together and exchanging ideas. However, a close relationship need not be really presumed. Strangers on the street may say ‘Hi’ as they pass you, and the clerk at the check-out counter of the grocery store will ask you. “How’re you doing?” This does not mean that you tell them that you have a cold and two exams coming up. A casual reply of, “Good, how about you?” is usually sufficient.

Social Invitations:
An invitation could be extended by a telephone call or a written note that specifies a time, date and place. It is polite to accept or refuse. If invited to a meal, you may offer to bring along some food or drink. It is considerate to send a thank you note as well, or to telephone your thanks the next day. If a friend has invited you to drop by anytime, it is best to call before visiting to make sure it is convenient for them. For a casual dinner invitation, do not arrive more than 5 minutes early, because your host may still be preparing for your visit. Arriving more than 10 minutes late is considered rude if very few people were invited. In case you will be late, it is best to call and inform the hosts.

Telephone Etiquette:
It is advisable to seek your host’s permission before using their telephone to make a call. You can reverse the call charges or use your Calling Card to pay for the call.

Noises:
It is not polite to burp in public or to slurp your soup. It is not appropriate to play loud music or otherwise disturb the peace late at night

Calendar Dates:
In the United States, dates are written as month/day/year. This is the opposite of the Indian method, in which dates are written day/month/year. So while 4/3/67 would be March 4, 1967 in India, it is April 3, 1967 in the United States. It is best to write out dates using the month name in order to avoid confusion.

Relationships:
Men and women generally treat each other as equals, and in an informal but respectful way. There are no traditional role demarcations as is in the case of Indians. It is acceptable for a woman to ask a man to go some place with her. The expenses may be divided, or one person may pay for both. To invite or accept a date expresses an interest to be with and to get to know that person. Women students must remember that they are not required to go out with anyone unless they really want to.

Some Common Social Behaviors of Americans:
Americans have no negative associations with feet and do not feel it necessary to prevent others from being touched by their feet. Americans show respect and deference for another person by looking him or her in the face, and not by looking down. Informal, relaxed postures are common. Lack of formal posture is not a sign of inattention or disrespect. Americans are uncomfortable with silence. They expect to talk constantly when in the presence of others. Even the weather is better as a topic than silence. When Americans offer food and drink, they expect the other person to say ‘yes’ at once if the food is desired. They do not expect polite refusals at first. You may not be asked a second time.

As in any culture, it takes time to make good friends. Just be patient, try to meet as many people as possible, and with time you may form friendships while in the United States that could last a lifetime.